Four about FOUR.

The Demie Diva may have the longest stretch of being four of any child known to man, woman, or child.

Or it may just be me.

1.  We lost a stretch of nine to twelve months.  Think about that.  How much growth and development happens at that stage?  Learning address and phone number.  Learning how to interact in a group setting where more than parallel play happens.  Learning that you will have to suck it up and follow the rules - even when the rules are in fact utter bollocks.  And those are just the holes I'm seeing filled in.

2. Four going on five is fun.  Seriously, that child is hilarious.

3. When she isn't driving me crazy.  Which she is.  Often when she's being hilarious.  Taking her Focalin has become a battle of epic proportions (and I hate mornings without the battle, so they're truly EPIC).  The other day she announced "That's not ice cream.  That's my consestrashun medicine."  To which the logical maternal counter "Yes, and I've taken mine, so you need to take yours" had the following effect:  "Hmmmm.... let me consider it."

Consider it.  Oh, I consider it daily.  I consider a lot of things daily, as that child of mine is a stinker of epic proportions.  She is going to fight for it to be HER way all the time.  All. The.  Time.

4.  This is where personality really comes out.  And while I see nurture all over her makeup, the inability to comply with rules simply because you have to, dammit if you want to function in a civil society, makes my rule following brain explode. That, my friends, is nature.

I know some of her birthmother's history.  What I know scares me for the future of this child.   The effect of pediatric epilepsy on her BM's educational history is a no-brainer to see.  The overmedication is clear - and so, if you read the letters we get periodically, is the ADHD that's NEVER been diagnosed.  When I look back at the last year of the Demie Diva's life I see so many places where I know that she was meant to be MY child.

Could someone else have puzzled out the connections between meds and behavior?  Sure.  Could someone have pushed for an early diagnosis of the ADHD?  Sure.  Could another parent have had the pediatrician I did who was all about early meds?  Sure.  Would it have all happened with what, in hindsight was a little bit of pushy parent (shut up ... and you know who you are) and a whole lot of instinct plus professional knowledge of a lot of people?  I don't know.

I do know that holding her for another year of pre-k is a good idea.  I watch things click, and the frustration she feels when she doesn't WANT to tell me (again) that y-o-u is "you" (why the hell should she, after all...she knew it a page ago), and the battle she has with herself every single time she stops to follow a rule or an adult request that she and I both know is complete and utter bollocks.....oh dear lord she'll be a cool adult.

But her childhood is going to be a spirited challenge!