Weekends are supposed to be relaxing...

Oh, I'm trying to be positive about this.  I really am.  But honestly, today was one of those days that HURT.

Today was the 40 something version of Four Weddings and a Funeral.  Only it was Two Birthday Parties and a Funeral.  The Funeral was, literally, a Funeral Mass.  It sucked because cancer took another mother of a young child too, too young.  Then, the Birthday Parties.

We had two today.  Concurrently.  For three kids.  The first was for the Demie Diva's friend from pre-K.  It was at one of those Jumpy places.  And, the year that the Demie Diva lost to epilepsy was so emotionally apparent.  But what was more apparent was that she couldn't cope with the stimuli.  It was too too much.  Too noisy.  Too many screaming kids (I have never wanted to grab a shrilly screaming 4 or 5 year old and scream "Shut the eff up" quite as much as I did a be-tutu-ed princess today).  Too many things with entrances that were holes that looked like CT-s and MRI-s.  She needed to leave about 30 minutes in.  The noise from the sound system hurt her ears.  The look on her face as her eyes started to get a little flat hurt my heart.

Epilepsy sucks.

So we went earlier than we'd planned to Party 2.  This one was a neighborhood party.  And we LOVE our 7 year old twin neighbors (and their awesome parents) so this was, to be wholly honest, the one party I look forward to every year.   Problem is that when you have twins, and you do ONE party, you get TWICE the number of kids.  And this was a year where the 7 to 4-and-a-half gap was huge.  Again, the year she lost - the fact that, realistically, she's emotionally not that much past where she was a year ago - was totally obvious.  And again...too many people. ... too much stimulus...too many places to choose.   It was an ADHD nightmare.

You know the cartoon "Which way did he go, George?" ... that was the Demie Diva. She's never seen Just Dance cause...gasp...I don't believe in game systems for the preschool set.  So, when the bigger girls were Wii dancing, she was doing her thing - till she realized she wasn't doing what the others were.  But the big boys were playing dodgeball - and the Demie Diva doesn't do things without purpose (NURTURE, baby) so she was all about that for two or three minutes and then ditching it.  

ADHD undoubtedly contributed, but I'm not about to increase her Focalin (which she needs) while we're decreasing the Keppra.  The latter drug has been what can only be described as the devil since the Demie Diva went on it.  She's been meaner than a snake, moody as hell, and now, as we titrate off of it, she's sad.  WEEPING sad.  We're dropping that a level tomorrow, which means that Monday through Thursday will, if the last titration is anything to go by, be hell.

So, to recap.  I went to a funeral.  Cried a bucket.  Took my child to two birthday parties - neither of which was great because of one disability or the other.  And am now sitting home on a Saturday night, trying to convince my own ADHD brain to be still when what I need to do is grade papers.

Midquarter grades are due this week.  The Demie Diva is dropping a level in the med that's messed with her personality for nearly a year.  My mother is coming on Thursday and my house is trashed.

It's gonna be a long week.